Kisstopher707 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Disappointment usually stems from expecting too much from strangers on Facebook.
←Rate | 07-15-2014 00:30 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only if these women were as thorough in choosing a man as they are in choosing which selfies to upload on facebook maybe they wouldn't get heartbroken so often.
←Rate | 07-13-2014 23:09 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon every stamp is a food stamp if you eat stamps
←Rate | 07-12-2014 08:48 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lonely, Sober and Miserable sound like the same sh*t to me.
←Rate | 07-04-2014 09:44 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hell is having a married couple tell you a story at the same time.
←Rate | 07-01-2014 01:20 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sweep her off her feet guys. Chicks are really impressed with UFC skills
←Rate | 06-24-2014 14:01 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kanye looks lovingly at Kim... "Thank you for coming to my wedding."
←Rate | 06-24-2014 02:07 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon No, seriously. My dog called 'Shotgun' - get in the back seat.
←Rate | 06-24-2014 02:06 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “You make me a better person.” - Me talking to my cup of coffee.
←Rate | 06-24-2014 01:53 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon In the rest of the world, it’s called “football,” but in America it’s called “Let’s see what else is on TV.”
←Rate | 06-24-2014 00:57 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kim and Kanye have been married WAY longer then I expected.
←Rate | 06-24-2014 00:49 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kim Kardashian is back in the studio, working on an album? She's turning her sex tape into a musical?
←Rate | 06-22-2014 06:06 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women who claim their favorite TV show is Keeping Up With The Kardashians, are just confessing they'll give blow jobs for a shopping spree.
←Rate | 06-21-2014 12:20 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My favorite Steven Seagull movie is Executive Decision because he dies in the first 15 minutes.
←Rate | 06-20-2014 00:47 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sorry I vomited all over your inspirational status.
←Rate | 06-19-2014 08:28 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Relationship status: "Yeah, we can totally go out, but first, I need you to take this short spelling test."
←Rate | 06-17-2014 14:42 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This Facebook is really cutting into my other time wasting activities.
←Rate | 06-17-2014 09:13 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I asked her how her day went 4 days ago and she is still telling me about it.
←Rate | 06-15-2014 11:55 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Give me constant mixed messages so I know..............nothing.
←Rate | 06-07-2014 14:00 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon After joining Facebook, my TV became radio.
←Rate | 06-01-2014 06:09 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  




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