Samir Momin Funny Status Messages

   I serve my "fck you's" with a smile. It just has a better effect that way. Don't you think?

   Why Do Guys Cheat On Pretty Girls With Ugly Ones....?

   Men may have created fire but women have discovered the art of playing with it..

   i'd be scared if a 400lb glass of koolaid came bursting into my house......

   Put a diaper on that mouth cuz you talk a lot of crap...

   WHY DO OLD PEOPLE DRIVE LIKE THEY GOT ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD, BUT YOUNG PEOPLE DRIVE LIKE THEIR DAYS ARE LIMITED....?

   I Dont Care If You're A Gangster, Pull Up Your Pants Please!

   Dear Tequila: We had a deal. You were supposed to make me sexier, smarter and a better dancer. But I saw the video. And I think we need to talk...

   dont you hate it when your busy everyone texts you but when your not, no one does....its like they know...

   Statistically, 132% of all people exaggerate....

   What do you say when an atheist sneezes...?

   I get worried when I see a pattern on my multiple choice sheet....

   I stick my leg out of my covers when its hot, but then I feel unprotected.

   Wishes he was a white crayon, so no one would use me...

   On relationship status they should have "is getting played by_____________"

   Im a good enough person to forgive you, but not stupid enough to trust you....

   If I had a kid at 16 I'd get my A$$ whooped, not a TV show.

   I dont have an attitude you just get on my damn nerves....

   I TOOK A DRUG TEST THE OTHER DAY AND THE TEST RESULTS CAME BACK NEGATIVE. WHICH MEANS MY DEALER HAS SOME F*CKING EXPLAINING TO DO...

   if you tickle my feet I am not responsible for what happens to your face....