Mick F Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon If I was ever given just one month to live, I'd watch a baseball game. It's an eternity.
←Rate | 06-08-2012 10:42 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon When it comes to music...Rock...um...uh...ROCKS.
←Rate | 06-02-2012 20:50 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just finished the last of the Girl Scout Thin Mints I've been hoarding. Child labor laws, schmabor laws. Those kids bake a damn good cookie.
←Rate | 03-08-2012 18:01 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today, I had the greatest Sunday dinner ever. I can't begin to define the level of greatness that this meal possessed. It was so great, I can't actually tell you you how truly great it was. I had Frosted Flakes.
←Rate | 01-08-2012 16:31 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Patients To An Indifferent Medical Staff At A Penile Implant Clinic: "Can't we all just get a long?"
←Rate | 01-04-2012 09:03 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon That Sinking Feeling: Facebook has worked very hard at making its new Timeline Profiles look like MySpace.
←Rate | 12-31-2011 15:55 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon The day before the annual Gregorian calendar re-set. Here's where I get all sappy and tell my pals how much they rock. You guys are the best. Happy New Year!
←Rate | 12-31-2011 09:32 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some guy is yelling, "Man, I'm fu*kin' such an idiot!" I said, "That's poor grammar, you should say, "Man, I'm such a fu*kin' idiot." He goes, "Naw man, I mean I'm having sex with someone with an IQ of 25 or lower."
←Rate | 12-16-2011 07:08 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love the holidays. A time when people are supposed to be more nice and caring, actually become bigger a$$holes than they are the rest of the year.
←Rate | 12-16-2011 06:54 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon The biggest trick life plays on us, is the inability to fully appreciate something until it's gone. Except for broccoli.
←Rate | 12-16-2011 06:49 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Newt Gingrich is the Republican front runner? I wouldn't bother getting those moving boxes just yet, Barack.
←Rate | 12-15-2011 23:23 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon I try to let women think I'm mysterious and not hard up....that's why I wait a good 45 seconds before I Poke someone back on facebook.
←Rate | 12-15-2011 12:33 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Close mindedness is the most abject form of blindness.
←Rate | 12-15-2011 10:19 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've come to the realization that I have attained the pinnacle of middle aged complacency. My Friday nights are mostly spent with the remote in one hand, and my b***s in the other.
←Rate | 12-06-2011 22:44 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon A hooker approached me while she was eating a bag of Lays. I instinctively produced a bag of Wise and ran in the opposite direction.
←Rate | 12-02-2011 06:40 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Anybody else go around clicking LIKE on all the hot chicks posts, no matter what stupid sh*t it is?
←Rate | 11-29-2011 10:49 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say pot is a Gateway drug. If I don't hurry up and smoke some, this POS Gateway computer is going out the window.
←Rate | 11-29-2011 07:51 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just finished a frenzied reciprocal poke session on facebook. I think my finger just came.
←Rate | 11-27-2011 12:16 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon The way I see it...if that Snooki character can be perceived as hot, we ALL have a shot at the same distorted perception.
←Rate | 11-20-2011 13:49 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon I made a donation to some guy who solicited me from the Occupy Movement. I mailed it to "Occupant".
←Rate | 11-14-2011 05:51 by Mick F Comments (0)  


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