Jerry Carter Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon We all name our dogs....But.... Wonder what they call us .....
←Rate | 06-03-2017 17:29 by Jerry Carter Comments (1)  


   messageicon I just got off the phone with a charity that wanted my old clothes for folks starving in Africa....Well I think it is a scam!!! Anyone that can wear my clothes sure ain't starving!!!!
←Rate | 01-16-2017 16:57 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had a late nite knock (rather hard) on the front door....Before I knew it I was flushing items down the commode.....On a side note....if you flush skittles it looks like a overhead view of NASCAR at Bristol..
←Rate | 10-11-2016 15:29 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I watched some of the debate last night...I kept on waiting for someone to say "Live from New York it's Saturday Nite"!!!!! But it never happened.....
←Rate | 10-10-2016 14:16 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon After the debate last night and according to tradition we should have a long hard winter....Both Hillary and Donald saw their shadows.
←Rate | 09-27-2016 15:10 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I watched the Olympics last night....I first watched competitive house remodeling, then Cooking with the nuwave oven, and finally finished the evening off with what I thought was going to be open water shark vacuuming....Olympics have sure changed...
←Rate | 08-11-2016 15:02 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon My bank account has been hacked....The hacker felt so sorry for me, he sent me a message and has started a gofundme page......
←Rate | 08-05-2016 13:17 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have an electric stove, but I prefer acoustic. The proceeding random thought was for all my musician friends........
←Rate | 07-20-2016 09:57 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon My credit score is so bad I have started receiving pre-declined credit card offers!
←Rate | 07-12-2016 16:38 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Are you tired of wal-mart rushing our holiday's? I can't believe it, They already have birthday cards out and it's still months away from my birthday!!!!
←Rate | 06-05-2016 08:50 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's with all these diaper companies.... I have tried three brands so far... The bag clearly says 12 to 14 pounds..... Folks I am here to tell you, not one brand held over 10 pounds before we had to change them.... Talk about a mess!!!!
←Rate | 05-30-2016 11:09 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just finished my taxes...As much as I am going to have to pay...The least Obama could do is send me a photo of the family I am sponsoring!!!!
←Rate | 03-15-2016 11:42 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I watched the news reports on what was going on in Chicago!!!! I had no idea Trump won the playoffs!!!!
←Rate | 03-12-2016 11:07 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon You ever felt like a fool, by waving your hands at a paper towel dispenser that turned out to not be automatic. Other folks in the rest room think you are a ninja of something....
←Rate | 08-23-2015 08:12 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had no idea Baltimore had won any type of championship!!!!
←Rate | 04-28-2015 09:22 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Where are all these beautiful singles in my area that want to meet me. I keep getting a popup with photo's of several ladies, However I have never noticed them at wal-mart, the grocery store, church, or anywhere around here. I Think this may be a scam!!
←Rate | 04-07-2015 09:40 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Woke up screaming Sunday morning. My apologies to everyone at church...
←Rate | 11-05-2014 09:00 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remember safety first.... Reach, Throw, Row, Go......Only you can rescue someone who may have stepped off into a pothole!
←Rate | 12-21-2013 20:34 by jerry carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just heard that in order to show no hard feelings, Phil has ordered the staff at Duck Commander to increase production of pink duck calls by 25%!! What a guy...
←Rate | 12-20-2013 11:57 by jerry carter Comments (1)  


   messageicon I am about tired of all this frozen global warming!
←Rate | 12-08-2013 23:03 by jerry carter Comments (0)  


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