GaryKoenig Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating


Search Messages:
[Clear]
«Previous
1

Search results for status messages containing 'GaryKoenig': View All Messages
Page: 1 of 22

   messageicon I'm gonna bake Valentine's Day cupcakes for a special someone today. That special someone is me.
←Rate | 02-16-2025 05:44 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon To all my friends who are committed: Happy Valentine's Day! And to all my friends who are single: Happy Independence Day!
←Rate | 02-15-2025 07:31 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you push a pull door and someone says, "You have to pull". Like yeah, my next plan was to start lifting it from the bottom.
←Rate | 02-13-2025 09:49 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't rush into a relationship. Be friends first. Maybe they have hotter friends. Thank me later.
←Rate | 02-12-2025 10:27 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate when cashiers feel the need to check if my money is real. If I could counterfeit money, I wouldn't be at Dollar Tree.
←Rate | 02-11-2025 05:38 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm really tired of the LED headlights on some cars. I'm really glad you can see 92 miles ahead, but the rest of us are blind now.
←Rate | 02-10-2025 05:41 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon Step 1: Go to a drive through. Step 2: Say "I'm sorry but I'm blind. Can you read the menu to me"? Step 3: See how long they'll read before realizing you can't drive if you're blind.
←Rate | 02-09-2025 05:39 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon Marriage tip: Every once in a while, call your wife by one of your ex-girlfriend's names. This will help her realize that she is not the only woman on the docket, and that you're a really good catch!
←Rate | 02-06-2025 11:13 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon God made the earth then rested. God made man then rested. God made woman and since then neither God nor man have rested again.
←Rate | 02-06-2025 10:51 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  


   messageicon Marriage tip: Whenever you do something good for your wife, make sure to let her know. For example: "Hey honey, I put all the laundry by the laundry machine. That way you can wash the clothes after you get done with dinner."
←Rate | 02-05-2025 13:15 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  



«Previous
1

[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left