Samir Momin Funny Status Messages
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I serve my "fck you's" with a smile. It just has a better effect that way. Don't you think?
Why Do Guys Cheat On Pretty Girls With Ugly Ones....?
Men may have created fire but women have discovered the art of playing with it..
WHY DO OLD PEOPLE DRIVE LIKE THEY GOT ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD, BUT YOUNG PEOPLE DRIVE LIKE THEIR DAYS ARE LIMITED....?
I Dont Care If You're A Gangster, Pull Up Your Pants Please!
i'd be scared if a 400lb glass of koolaid came bursting into my house......
Dear Tequila: We had a deal. You were supposed to make me sexier, smarter and a better dancer. But I saw the video. And I think we need to talk...
dont you hate it when your busy everyone texts you but when your not, no one does....its like they know...
What do you say when an atheist sneezes...?
I get worried when I see a pattern on my multiple choice sheet....
I stick my leg out of my covers when its hot, but then I feel unprotected.
Wishes he was a white crayon, so no one would use me...
Im a good enough person to forgive you, but not stupid enough to trust you....
If I had a kid at 16 I'd get my A$$ whooped, not a TV show.
I TOOK A DRUG TEST THE OTHER DAY AND THE TEST RESULTS CAME BACK NEGATIVE. WHICH MEANS MY DEALER HAS SOME F*CKING EXPLAINING TO DO...
On relationship status they should have "is getting played by_____________"
Gas for trip to Walmart: $4.75 Miley Cyrus movie: $19.95 Box of tissue: $2.95 Hand Lotion: $3.78 The look of disgust on the cashiers face:
ever noticed on sponge bob that krusty crab is in bikini bottom...?
it takes 42 muscles to frown, But it only takes 4 muscles to extend ur arm out and smack'em in the head...
I was good at math before they decided to mix the alphabet in it...
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