Seth Sanders Funny Status Messages

   The U.S. Army developed a pizza that stays good for 3 years. Finally, those billions in military spending paid off. Your move, Al Qaeda.

   Today I accidentally dropped my sunglasses into the toilet and flushed them. Tomorrow a very cool alligator will rule the sewers.

   Every so often you come across a person that supplies you with endless motivation, even if it is just to jump into traffic.

   Body language can be so subtle that only an intuitive person can read your mood. Body slams, I have found, are far more direct.

   Owning a car is having a friend you can scream inside of.