JEREMYCAKES Funny Status Messages

   Definition of a guy who knows nothing about women: A guy who thinks PMS is that american tv channel that shows like Nova and Antiques Roadshow come on.

   So many cool gadgets around. The iPad, iPhone, iPod, etc. It's strange though, none of the electronics stores seem to have this iCarly thing that the kids are all talking about.

   I need a beer! I need another beer. I think I'll have another one. Iguetss jusst on moer. I'lll hav jush one morrrre. Blaaaahhhh.

   You know da day is off to a bad start when you realize you put your dirty socks in the toaster, two slices of bread in the toilet and peed in the laundry hamper.

   I had dinner with Cheech and Chong earlier. It was great! But those brownies we had for dessert tasted kind of strange.

   A little advie: Never EVER buy sushi from the home shopping network.

   Osama Bin Laden has updated his facebook status. The FBI has left the afganistan/Pakistan border and is now searching for him in Farmville.

   I think the Angry Birds could use some anger management counselling. Mellow out, my cranky avian bros!

   People are often worried about the mafia, but I think it's Justin Beiber we should be worried about. Get on Beibers bad side and he can send tens of thousends of angry young girls over to your house to totally kick your butt! Beib's the new John Gotti.