bill Funny Status Messages

   I think Ben Roethlisberger got his hands on Brett Favre's phone??

   The lady's on FB are up to something again, I think I like this as much as the bra color thing..... ; )

   Sorry friends......But from the advice of my lawyer, it's in my best interest not to try out Facebook's new 'Questions' feature tonight : (

   Maybe the TSA is just offering prostate screenings as part of Obama's healthcare reform???

   I received a Jury Summons today, guess its better then receiving an Arrest Warrant???

   lol, Any of you morons ever hear of snopes? Stop hating on Pepsi....

   Wow!! Scientists have created mice from two males. Sadly, the mice cannot ask, nor tell, about it. ....

   Perfect example of living life to the fullest kids...... RIP Ryan Dunn, jackass.

   there any way we can blame gas prices on Charlie Sheen?

   anyone interested in having a Rapture party this weekend?

   I guess the Obama's need another vacation to Rio to take a break... Apparently picking all 4 #1 seeds in his March Madness bracket was just to much on him?? What a SLACKER!!!

   The new 'Huckleberry Finn' - where Jim is shackled, beaten & kept as human livestock, but nobody calls him any bad words.

   Happy Groundhogs Day. No way Phil is coming out of his hole today.....

   Due to public service cutbacks, the Rapture is simply going to be based on Santa's Naughty/Nice List.

   I remain concerned that without Internet access, the people of Egypt may not know that Charlie Sheen is okay.

   It appears to me that Brett Favre was fined $25k per inch in the Jen Sterger affair.....

   For those who will celebrate Cinco de Mayo with "authentic" 36% beef tacos, we pray to the Lord.

   I poured milk on my Cheerios this morning and they turned into Fruit Loops......But hey, there is no need for concern : )

   What kills me is the say the birds and fish in Arkansas all died simultaneously due to stress...What stress, do they over due bills to pay or something??

   living the dream ...one fist pump at a time