anonymous Funny Status Messages

   busier than a cucumber in a woman's prison.

   In the chemistry lab, proving that ugliness is more than skin deep.

   putting the pro into procrastination

   has decided that when I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car

   beating his record for consecutive days alive!

   riding the ponies outside of Wallmart be back when I run out of quarters.

   up to no good.

   "not a complete idiot, some parts are missing "

   If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

   "Too many freaks, not enough circuses"

   moving the furniture out of the room because the dog and I are going to breakdance battle...oh it is ON!!!!

   calculating the cost of a train ride to Hawaii

   turning on Airplane mode on his iPhone but can't figure out why it still won't fly!

   wants to Google her Myspace while she Twitters my Yahoo.

   may contain traces of nuts.

   wonders what would happen if he was scared half to death....twice??

   blames it on the alcohol.

   Despised or idolized... either way I'm recognized!

   not on speaking terms with his liver

   informing you that 95% of teens would cry if they saw the Jonas Brothers at the top of a skyscraper about to jump. Copy and paste this EVERYWHERE if you are in the 5% that would shout Jump!!