KIsstopher Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon "It's not what it looks like!" - said when something is exactly what it looks like
←Rate | 02-02-2013 12:28 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon At least he died doing what he loved: texting while driving.
←Rate | 02-06-2013 14:19 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do not put a party hat on a cat. They are seldom in a party mood.
←Rate | 03-09-2013 13:04 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why would you stay friends with your ex? When you get fired from a job, you don't stick around and watch other people do your job.
←Rate | 05-17-2012 12:52 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon A tip for you joggers out there: To run faster, make sure there is an attractive person in front of you at all times OR a creepy guy behind you.
←Rate | 02-06-2012 10:02 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Blaming others for your misfortune can ruin your health -- which you'll probably just blame on somebody else too.
←Rate | 08-29-2011 09:59 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Masturbation is like math. You can always count on your fingers.
←Rate | 10-20-2012 12:37 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I know a few women that would be considered very handsome if they were men.
←Rate | 03-21-2012 11:56 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from woman : a little bit support and a little bit of freedom
←Rate | 04-19-2011 08:21 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why is it that whenever I wish someone a happy birthday they always assume Facebook reminded me? Do you ever think maybe just maybe I care that much to remember the day you were born.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 01:31 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon We all suffer from a stroke at some point in our lives. Whether it be a stroke of bad luck, a blood clot, or a dry handjob.
←Rate | 11-07-2011 13:58 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon I shall open my own deli and my slogan will be: "No one beats my meat!"
←Rate | 10-26-2011 15:26 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Karma is like 69: You get, what you give.
←Rate | 10-06-2012 10:25 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some people are in a long distance relationship with common sense.
←Rate | 02-28-2013 07:52 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Male lions fight to impress the females. Bears do it, crocodiles do it and even men do it. Moral of the story: Females get you killed!!
←Rate | 12-20-2012 09:21 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The sun rises with coffee and sets with whiskey.
←Rate | 01-15-2013 13:19 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The day Rick Ross jumps into the crowd will be the day we find out who his LOYAL fans are.
←Rate | 09-14-2012 09:16 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon A drunk person is just an awesome version of a sober person.
←Rate | 03-10-2012 04:32 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I alway realise that they're crazy way too late in the game.
←Rate | 09-16-2012 12:44 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon 5 out of 3 people struggle with Maths.
←Rate | 05-03-2013 04:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  




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