Flinnie Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'Flinnie': View All Messages
Page: 23 of 64

   messageicon If you make a wish at 11:11 on 11/11/11 it will come true. Provided that your wish was to waste seconds of your life
←Rate | 11-11-2011 10:59 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm glad there's an "international" sign for choking, because a foreign speaker might think you were just wildly signaling for a turtleneck.
←Rate | 05-14-2013 07:15 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon It seems like it's too early in the week to give up, but it isn't.
←Rate | 09-20-2011 07:18 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I'm ever in a coma, promise me you'll slip pizza into my IV.
←Rate | 10-03-2015 10:04 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon .it's almost time for my OBGYN appointment and I haven't even bought a doctor's coat or faked my credentials yet.
←Rate | 12-19-2011 13:48 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Want to clear out a room quickly? Start playing muskrat love loudly. You are welcome.
←Rate | 02-18-2012 06:24 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to think that every time firemen get a call they're like "Yaaay! We get to ride in the truck!" then they laugh & tickle each other
←Rate | 08-05-2011 23:11 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I only say "God bless you" twice. If you sneeze a third time I assume you cant be blessed and you're a demon who must be destroyed.
←Rate | 03-30-2012 10:03 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today's a great day to stalk someone you haven't seen since high school and say, "You wrote 'keep in touch' in my yearbook, well here I am!"
←Rate | 05-12-2012 08:06 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't care if people call you the space cowboy, gangster of love or Maurice. I think you're delusional.
←Rate | 07-14-2011 18:24 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon If there's anything better than yelling at squirrels, I'd sure like to know what it is.
←Rate | 10-15-2011 08:04 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Drawing sunglasses on the sun never really made sense to me.
←Rate | 12-19-2011 14:20 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Car alarms would be a lot more effective if they sounded like two people fighting. Everyone would turn their had for that
←Rate | 12-18-2012 06:05 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Men's Warehouse guy is going to die of lung cancer. I guarantee it.
←Rate | 05-19-2012 07:15 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's called lunar assault & it isn't funny
←Rate | 02-20-2012 18:41 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a confession to make to all the rappers out there: I waved my hands in the air and I cared a little bit.
←Rate | 04-28-2012 06:37 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Harry Potter's movie reinforces one stereotype. That an army of evil is still surprisingly inept at killing the main character
←Rate | 07-16-2011 20:03 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd like to see the tambourine make a roaring comeback into modern music.
←Rate | 12-25-2011 18:58 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don't audibly fart when you're getting a security patdown at the airport, the terrorists win.
←Rate | 11-04-2011 09:10 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I were homeless, I'd stand in front of other homeless dudes and hold a sign that says "He's lying."
←Rate | 11-10-2011 09:49 by flinnie Comments (0)  




[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left