KIsstopher Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Best way to realize if you have a stupid idea is to consider who agrees with it and who doesn't.
←Rate | 03-12-2013 05:17 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon A snake bit me today and my neighbour's wife was kind enough to suck the venom out. Or at least that's what I told my wife when she walked in on us.
←Rate | 02-19-2012 09:44 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The silence between my status updates is the sound of my real life.
←Rate | 06-04-2012 14:17 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you feel you 'have nobody to blame but yourself' you're not trying hard enough. I can always find someone to pin it on.
←Rate | 04-17-2013 13:07 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The instructions for this tent is just a picture of a husband yelling at his wife, that's weird.
←Rate | 01-31-2013 01:25 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon My favorite button on Facebook is the one that says “not now.” The world needs more buttons like that.
←Rate | 06-06-2012 13:27 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Not everyone who plays with you is on your team.
←Rate | 10-05-2011 00:12 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon I’m so glad I found you in all this wreckage of a planet.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 14:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm fairly patient. I can wait 5 seconds for you to respond to my text.
←Rate | 09-29-2012 08:40 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If these walls could talk, there would just be one more thing in this house that doesn't answer me when I speak.
←Rate | 11-16-2012 07:43 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon So, I'm single again, this time with no intentions of looking for another girl, this time I'm letting her find me.
←Rate | 06-15-2011 12:07 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon The dilemma with resisting temptation is that it may never be offered again.
←Rate | 02-05-2012 01:41 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Teach me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.
←Rate | 06-03-2011 07:50 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm sorry officer, I thought you wanted to race.
←Rate | 11-05-2011 12:31 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girlfriend said I treat her like she doesn't exist so I told her I didn’t even know I had a girlfriend.
←Rate | 02-08-2013 06:09 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness".
←Rate | 04-24-2011 12:04 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life can be like a prick, Sometimes it gets hard for no apparent reason.
←Rate | 05-07-2011 10:02 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today the rest of you women don't matter til' Monday...and when Tuesday rolls around a couple of you still won't matter.
←Rate | 05-08-2011 04:00 by KIsstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I had a pu$$y, I would never be broke!
←Rate | 08-04-2011 03:17 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you insist on acting like an idiot then I must insist on treating you like one.
←Rate | 11-04-2011 16:22 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  




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