Rick h. Funny Status Messages

   Finally some "CHANGE" we can sink our teeth into. Chicken and Waffles at the I-Hop!

   This new Facebook friend viewer application so you can see your friends online is kind of weird. Its like they don't even know you can see them.

   Now thinking that I had the 455.00 back that I spent on fireworks....

   anyone's Facebook acting strange today? Mine just tried to fondle me....

   After the movie Magic Mike is released this weekend all the theatre seats are going to looks like snails crawled across them...

   Note to self: Lets keep those intimate times to ourselves..

   On my third cup of coffee and the day is looking real good. I think its going to be a great day. Did I mention its going to be a fantastic day.......

   Just found out this Beanie Baby collection was not a great investment.

   Just because your a great grand-mother does not give you the right to wear "Juicy" on the seat of your pants...

   Just sprayed the new Febreeze "Carnival Cruise" air fragrance throughout the home. Now the whole place smells like sh*t..

   Looks like I got 2 more of those pesky drones last night in the bug whacker.....

   Even after watching the interview tonight Charlie Manson was thinking "This boy has lost his mind!"

   After seeing Jennifer Aniston new boyfriend, I just realized that possibly I did have a chance....

   Lindsay Lohan has been released, so hide your jewelry....

   Two words that should never be together: Redneck Couture

   My neighbor must have not paid her internet bill. I can't get on the internet.

   Got insomnia? May I suggest watching the CMA's.

   Breaking News: Romney buys rights to all Jack in the Box tacos sold in Colorado

   Just heard that Janet Jackson and Randy Travis are doing the Super Bowl halftime show..

   Tried to buy a Harley today but they said I had no balding as of yet?