yobs Funny Status Messages

   In awkward situations, we all pretend to text.

   ❒ Single ❒ Taken ✔ Eating

   First time on a roller coaster. Final Destination.

   What you do when people sing happy birthday to you: 5% - Sing. 10% - Smile. 85% - Sit there like a dumbf#ck trying to figure out what to do.

   ❒ Single. ❒ Taken. ✔ Helping Mario get his biatch Peach back!

   Saying you'll wake up early in the morning to get something done, then in the morning convincing yourself it's not important.

   I can't live without y̶o̶u̶. FOOD...

   That mini heart attack you get when you reach in your pocket and your phone isn't there.

   Karma takes too long ..... I'd rather beat the sh%t out of you.

   That hilarious moment when someone tries to make you jealous, when you honestly don't give a fuck.