timouthy Funny Status Messages

   I purposely bought the same grill my neighbor has, so every time it needs to be cleaned, I just switch them at night.

   ....Nothing says "F@#K YOU" better than "your call has been forwarded to automatic voice message center"

   Sometimes when I am filling up my car with gas, I like to take the antenna off the car challenge the person at the next pump over to a f@#king sword fight.

   .Been staring at this cardinal in my tree outside my window... If he don't get down in the next five minutes, I'm calling the f@#king church!

   .Bullying Support Group meeting, tonight at 8pm. You'd better f@#king be there.

   I just bought some wallpaper and I'm making it listen to Justin Bieber. Maybe it will hang itself.