lauren moro Funny Status Messages

   I need audio of crickets chirping on my phone so I can play after someone I don't like says a bad joke.

   we spend the money we don't have, to buy the things we don't need, to impress the people we don't like.

   How you get sleepy after crying, It's like your mind is telling you, “you've suffered enough, it's time to shut down for a bit.”

   Life is a comedy for those who think, a tragedy for those who feel, and a pie eating contest for me

   Technically, I don't really go to bed. I just give up on the day.

   The more I get to know other people, the less I hate myself.

   Don`t flatter yourself, I sent a friend request not a marriage proposal.

   you know it's cold when chickens are running to KFC to use the deep fryer.

   I was stopped 4 speeding! The officer got out of her car, Said to me"'I been waiting 4u all day''.I replied "Got here as fast as I can". she laugh and let me go!

   Singing passionately in the shower, pretty good idea. Dancing passionately in the shower, not so much.