YouCantSeeMe Funny Status Messages

   When I was in high school I was suspended for fingering a girl behind the bike shed. Now my son is in junior school and history is repeating itself. I've been arrested this time though.

   I always bring a condom with me on a night out. Unfortunately, it's always the same one.

   What do black guys have that's longer than most white men's and gets even bigger when they touch a woman? Their criminal record.