TRUEMAN Funny Status Messages

   .. I maybe dumb enough to listen to him, but I am smart enough not to believe him.

   I've been invited to a neighbour's house later for drinks with nibbles!...they treat that bloody cat like Royalty?

   Pumpkin for sale! [slightly used]

   My mother in law won "best decorated house" yesterday for Halloween?..she was only opening the curtains?

   I often get a "yes" from women...but it's usually followed by..."that's him officer"

   I walked into the library yesterday and asked if they had the reference work.."Calcification Of The Spine"...The librarian said..."I've got a hardback"...I said..."Yeah...that's the one...thank you!!"

   Puppet theft is getting out of hand!

   I'm an elephant Circumcisionist! The money's lousy...but the tips are huge!!

   The body of a man was found in Pizza Hut this morning, covered in cheese, tomatoes, onions and peperami Police are working on the theory that he may have topped himself!!

   To err is hunam!!