Surge Yarmolyuk Funny Status Messages

   I turn the music louder so I won't hear my thoughts, but it's stupid because the lyrics remind me of what I'm trying to forget. 

   12/21/12 falls on a Friday. Looks like the world's had enough of Rebecca Black.

   "It's impossible," said pride. "It's risky," said experience. "It's pointless," said reason. "Give it a try," said the heart.

   Cheating is a choice... Not a mistake.

   Don't let him ruin your life, he already ruined your mascara

   Cell phones should have the option to change "airplane mode" to "drunk mode" that way your drunk texts never leave your phone.

   After reading this sentence you will realize that the the brain doesn't recognize a second 'the'.

   Two things define your Personality, The way you manage things when you have nothing. The way you behave when you have everything.

   'Everyday I'm shufflin!' Wait no, except on Fridays. I gotta get down on Fridays.

   Difference between promises and memories? We break promises, and our memories break us.