StonerDudee Funny Status Messages

   When your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, your pants are tucked into your shirt. Think about it.

   A secret handshake will get you into the "Beyond" section of Bed Bath & Beyond. Includes videogames, beer & lightsabers. Ask for Steve.

   This bar doesn't know it yet, but it's about to be karaoke night.

   iPhone covers are like condoms. You don't want to, but you kind of have to...

   I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know.

   I just saved a bunch of fu<ks by not giving any.

   Autocorrect is changing correctly spelled words. I'm starting to think it has a mind of its AUTOCORRECT IS HARMLESS. GO ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS.

   Sorry I kept stopping erratically. I was pumping FU<K YOU in Morse Code with my brake lights.

   My ex said she left me because of my short attention span. Unbeknownst to her I actually...damn. Thats a cool ass word right? Unbeknownst..

   sitting here laughing while putting marijuana seeds in a bird feeder