RM Funny Status Messages

   I woke up early this morning and it dawned on me.....OH SH!T, I betta go back to sleep! Lmao!

   It always confuses me when I see that sign in the bathroom that reads..."DO NOT FLUSH FOREIGN OBJECTS"...ha! Yeah, as if what's coming out of my a$$ isn't Foreign enough!

   GHETTO WORD OF THE DAY: OMELETTE- "Imma punch fit what you jes said, but OMELETTE this one go this time.

   JERSEY SNORE. And No! That's not a typo ;)

   Doing the Moonwalk is the only way to look cool while wiping dog crap off your shoe.

   Weird compliments are fun. "I like your shoelaces man." "Why? They're just regular shoelaces?" "Hey now, don't be insecure, those shoelaces are smazzylicious," then walk away. Their expression way

   This Sunny D tastes like I can't afford orange juice.

   Dear FAMILY: Thanks so much for putting my empty cereal box back in the cabinet. Now I can have disappointment for breakfast.

   I want to go to prison....I hear the exercise program there is AWESOME!!!

   One of my greatest joys in life is when I've found an old friend on facebook......And they've gotten fat!! lol #iwentthere