Eddy Funny Status Messages

   Eating a bowl of Sour Patch Kids cereal. I added milk & drowned the kids.... I'm a CEREAL killer

   My friend is single and middle-aged. I think she might be Catholic. Sorry, I mean cat-holic.

   If you don't like your coworkers, go to work dressed up like a bear. Tell people "don't poke the bear"

   When everyone can see you're being a d!(k .... you're a cting like grey sweatpants

   Pee-Wee Herman died. In lieu of flowers, buy a ticket to the adult movie theater

   Why do gender reveal parties only surprise you with blue or pink? I've never seen anyone reveal the whole rainbow. Aren't people supposedly "born this way" ?

   What do you call a snowman in July? ...a puddle

   When the China balloon was flying across the country, the Government should have used planes and jets to send it to the Seattle space needle

   Today isn't just for the kids..... it's also an egg hunt for the adults that are procrastinators

   When a police car circles around to go after the criminal, how do you know it's a police car? .... It just did a donut