@The69Sheriff Funny Status Messages

   What do you think the employee discount is at the Dollar Store? Do you think it's 'just take it'?

   I want my tombstone to say "Don't just stand there... water my flowers."

   Controversy in Tibet... they are naming the first black Dalai Lama, the Dalai Lamar.

   I wonder if I ask too many hypothetical questions?

   Remember the good ol' days when people robbed banks... not the other way around?

   Chicken pot pie sounds like such a good idea... if you add commas.

   M.C. Hammer should be a security guard at an art museum.

   I just unlocked the "Restraining Order" badge by stalking people who use 4square.

   I want to wear a "One in the Oven" shirt backwards... so the arrow points to my ass.

   "We Built This City on Slave Labor and Freemason Secrets" - Thomas Jefferson Starship.