JAB Funny Status Messages

   75% of women who smoke swallow. . .

   Boy the way Led Zeppelin played, songs that debuted on MTVeeem, guys like us were getting laid. . . those were the days. . .

   Fact is. We'll all get to do the kick the bucket challenge. . .

   I think I will go for a drive, just to pick my nose. . .

   Roses are red, violets are blue, a case of beer costs less than dinner for two. . .

   Joan Rivers is in the hospital doing the kick the bucket challenge. . .

   I will accept drink a case of beer challenge. . .

   Two cannibals are eating a clown and one says to the other, does this taste funny to you. . .

   Growing up Italian. My mothers meatballs are better than your Moms. . .

   A bucket of ice water is no challenge. Now, a bucket of s#it from a portajohn is a challenge. . .

   I tried to buy a zebra from the zoo and I was told it was not for sale. I said it should be it has bar codes all over it. . .

   If he doesn't with the Super Bowl this year with the Jets. Rex Ryan asked Bill Belichick to sell him one of his Super Bowl rings. . .

   Facebook. The lost and found for people. . .

   I remember back in the 70's when Yoga was called Twister. . .

   If I've learned anything from the Kardashians... it's that I shouldn't let my complete lack of talent hold me back. Now who wants to make some porn. . .

   Since when did the bucket list turned into the bucket challenge. . .

   I was wondering if I go on a Banana diet, will I end up throwing my feces like a gorilla does. . .

   I think states are over looking the Dr Kevorkian method. Enough said. . .

   The best part about being an adult is, nobody can tell you, you can't have ice cream for breakfast. . .

   Hello, it was great ignoring each other while I was here. We need to do this more often. . .