Dylan Bosch Funny Status Messages

   Dear Santa, Don't bother coming to my house this year. I've been naughty and it was f*cking worth it, you judgemental son of a b*tch!"

   I Can't find my phone! Could you call it? Oh wait, it was only in my pocket.. haha got you're Number!"

   Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep; if I die before I wake ... will someone please delete my internet browser history."

   First 5 people to like this shall receive a hand crafted statue of me wrestling an invisible bear."

   All right, let's solve this once and for all. It was ME who pushed Humpty Dumpty, I also took Little Bo Peeps sheep for ransom, I was the one who let the dogs out and stole the cookies from the cookie jar. So there!!"

   So let me get this right, I cant legally smoke marajuana, yet I can go to my local gun store and buy a Semi Automatic Machine Gun, a couple of grenades and all the ammo I want? Now who's the one that's been smoking something here?"

   stupid campaign commercials. Because of them, Everytime before I "Like" someone else's status I say to myself. My name is 'X' and I approve this message

   stupid campaign commercials. Because of them, Everytime before I "Like" someone else's status I say to myself. My name is 'X' and I approve this message

   still gets Rick Roll'd on youtube every once in awhile."

   Boys have to put forth real effort to get laid, while all girls have to do is stand bra-less in the wind."

   you never really realise how sexy a nerd, dork or tomboy can be until you see them in a Halloween Costume.."

   Hi, I'm chucky! wanna play?"

   hates that kids complain about video games for "Loading"... Back in my day we had to blow the sh*t out of games just to play'em and even then it was a gamble to work. So kids, Shut up!"

   I will take a chance, I will Dance until the Day I Die, I will never look back.. Did I really need Katy Perry to tell me all that? No, But after watchin' her music video. I will dream like a teenager tonight."

   why don't they just make a James Bond Television Series? Because if you think about it, there's already enough movies to make one season."

   alot of people when they go to concerts they yell out "Wooo! or Yeah!" I like to yell out more specific things like "The way you play you're Music makes feel Good Inside!!"

   dislikes people who make fun of Brett Favre just because of his age. Basically all you're saying is "He's older then me, and still play's the game better then I ever will."

   Why do we say sorry even when they bumped into us? It's way funnier when people say "Excuse You" anyways.

   I Don't Care what anybody says, Nothing says I Love you more like standing in line for you're girl to buy tampax pearl."

   Heigh ho! Heigh ho! It's Off to the Bar I go.."