joseph robert Funny Status Messages

   kids are like farts, I can barely stand my own let alone other peoples

   In memory of matcho man R.S. and in preparation for the Rapture, I'm going to buy enough slim jims to snap in to for the next five months

   I think I'm going to call in raptured to work on monday

   I killed Bigfoot! I also have a few aliens in my basement! You gotta trust me because I said so! Oh by the way I have pictures but you can't look at them!

   I would just like to point out on this momentous occasion today that historically, Roalty has always been a product of inbreeding

   Someone needs to tell my apt building that tapping the handle on a shower nozzle shouldn't change the temperature by thousands of degrees at once