Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Boba Fett was an embarrassment to us all- Dog the Bounty Hunter

   There is nothing is more awkward than driving through a 'One Way' street without knowing it and you meet up with another car face to face, then have to drive half a mile in reverse.

   3/17/2011 - 3/20/11 RIP - My NCAA Tournament Bracket

   im dying to see the americans plant a C5 up Ghadafi's candy ass and light it with a matchstick and take pics and post it up on facebook and tag me to it so that I can see the pics while feasting on a bag of potato chips

   does this "no fly zone" mean I can't use the trip to Libya I purchased from my Nigerian lottery winnings?

   Waiting for them to blame "Bush" for attacking Libya...just saying

   Hey dude, I am way to high for you to be creeper staring at me right now. None-the-less trying to physically touch me... back off, eat a nacho, and just watch the movie. Sincerely, Female stoners

   considering their age and current physiques, I think Arnold Schwarzenegger VS Sylvester Stallone would be a great street fight, although Stallone has a very slight edge

   I argue with myself sometime because I know for a fact that I'll win

   Im the swaglord you have been blessed

   If Microsoft Word has taught me anything it's that if I want to get a point across, I need to use bullets.

   Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I'll rememeber; involve me and I'll understand.

   it me or is majority of your high school friends more ‘Antisocial' these days on Facebook. Like we're all strangers or something…..No? Ok its not just me.

   So today is officially the first day of Spring! Just think, only a mere 277 more days till Winter arrives again...

   Methinks someone in Washington has discovered that "Hope and Change" is a lot easier to say than it is to deliver .

   The national debt is up 40% since Inauguration Day. Unemployment is up 1.2%. We're not only still fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan; we're now engaged with Libya. Gas prices are approaching $4.00/gal, and we're halfway through the fiscal year and sti

   Note to self: That was way to much beer!

   50% of my weirdness makes the other 50% creepy.

   Breaking: French warplanes engaging Libyan air force. Related: France surrenders to Libya.

   Why is Germany sitting out the no-fly Zone? Uh, history of losing in N. Africa?