MigasJoe Funny Status Messages

   Got my favorite Christmas movie, A Christmas Story, from my in-laws for my birthday. I was shocked that the DVD version is abbreviated to 90 minutes. I always thought it was 24 hours.

   Got a copy of The Christmas Story today...I was surprised they edited the DVD down to 96 minutes...I always enjoyed the 24 hour version of the movie

   Time magazine named "protestors" as people of the year. Here's an idea for the Ass bags at Time. If you want to honor a group of people, how about the members of Seal Team Six!!!!!

   it just me or does anybody else find it weird that the Mets took out a $40 million dollar loan from Bank of America. Considering that they play at Citi Field????

   I've never had to have the need for mistle toe to get the ladies.

   There is no "I" in team, but there is a "U" in suck.

   Life would be so much easier if chocolate was a health food and they allowed drinking at work

   Apparantly Friday was National Day of the Ninja. I was completely unaware of it. Well played Ninja Day… well played

   Alcohol: Because no good story ever starts with "So this one time I was eating a salad..."

   the best revenge is to be happy...or laxitives in brownies, whichever

   Maybe thats why she didnt win American Idol

   God as my witness...I thought Turkeys could fly!!!!

   Nothing makes me more nervous than receiving facebook emails after a weekend of drinking that says "you have been tagged in a photo"

   I don't make typos...I make new words

   Holy Sh!t...Did Christina Aguilera get stung by a bee or something

   thankful that I have a job and can afford a nice Thanksgiving dinner and Christmas...and beer

   Like nature and opportunities, when booty calls...I answer

   My wife has been worried about her weight...i told her to keep her chins up...

   Best part of living alone...clothing optional

   I love the looks that can only be shared with you and another customer in a grocery line