Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 4820 of 6374
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We don't go to high school to find our husband, but to find our bridesmaids.
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06-04-2011 02:54
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There are a lot of great talents in Youtube compared to these overrated, Auto Tuned signed hypes...
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06-04-2011 02:21
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i almost rather burn than have to change my smoke detector battery
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06-03-2011 23:51 by levon
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We often fear being rejected so very much that we reject ourselves first before anyone else has the chance.
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06-03-2011 23:07 by BEGO
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Saw this person's photo on Facebook & I thought to myself ” DAMN I'D HIT THAT “……with a truck. “
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06-03-2011 23:05 by BEGO
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Before Facebook, I had told maybe six people “Happy Birthday,” ever.
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06-03-2011 23:04 by BEGO
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A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.
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06-03-2011 23:03 by BEGO
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Admit it, sometimes, even when your crush does something really weird…. it still looks cute for you.
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06-03-2011 23:02 by BEGO
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Sometimes no news is the best news
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06-03-2011 22:31
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Ate a porcupine for lunch and now isn't feeling well. I think it was spiked
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06-03-2011 22:26
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Hears that the youth in Asia are in mourning after the death of Dr Kevorkian
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06-03-2011 22:24
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I woke up the other night and my entire body was soaked in urine... I was really pissed.
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Dear Jack Kevorkian... You will be greatly missed by all the youth in Asia.
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06-03-2011 21:03
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I HATE BEING BI-POLAR....IT'S AWESOME!!!
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06-03-2011 19:52
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Why is it that the only socially acceptable thing to scratch and sniff in public is a sticker?
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I would pay good money to watch a midget ride a Pitbull .
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06-03-2011 18:32
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I enjoy blowing the horn as I drive past the Blind School and watch all the kids wave in the wrong direction .
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06-03-2011 18:26
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I haven't been this bored since my summer as an Amish mechanic .
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06-03-2011 18:25
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Oh Jack Kevorkian... you're in heaven making Terri Schiavo laugh now.
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06-03-2011 17:35
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Having 50 friends in common doesnt automatically mean we know each other and should be friends.
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06-03-2011 17:34
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