Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 437 of 6383
I went to a gender reveal for a litter of puppies and it went: good girl, good boy, good boy, good girl, good girl, good boy.
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03-26-2020 10:54
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A man and a woman can go 21 days on Naked and Afraid with no toilet paper and you sissys can't go one day without 20 rolls.
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03-26-2020 08:07
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I can't wait to one day tell my grand kids, "When I was your age, toilet paper was everywhere! You could find all over the place, even in gas station food marts1"
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03-26-2020 08:00
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now we're talking post below.. funny post finally
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03-26-2020 07:59
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The world all of a sudden feels like a casual stroll through a Chuck E. Cheese ball pit at the end of a busy weekend.
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03-26-2020 07:58
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Check out the hypocrisy in the post below. Whines about no humorous posts, but doesn't come up with a humorous way to do it.
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03-26-2020 07:09
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not even a virus outbreak can help yall come up with good stuff
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03-25-2020 22:55
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Day #....idk....of staying home and everything is great! even though I don't know what day this is, or how many days I've been awake, or if I can eat these flowers?
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03-25-2020 22:44
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So when do we start the old people offerings to the Dow — I believe he's the brother of Zeus and Poseidon — God of the Economy & Bailout Bonuses?
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03-25-2020 21:41
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I love that ordering delivery now feels like helping the country & rebuilding the economy whereas before it just felt lazy & financially irresponsible.
#WednesdayThoughts #SaferAtHome
Remember laughing at Michael Jackson wearing mask and gloves. Now you all out here looking like you wanna be starting something.
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03-25-2020 21:13 by BEGO
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I've absorbed so much disinfectant and soap that when I pee I clean the toilet
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03-25-2020 18:03
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Last night was amazing out dancing and singing with all my friends together celebrating the end of the Coronavirus!....until our garbage truck outside woke me up :/
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03-25-2020 16:12
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Whoever said a mask and gloves were enough to go to the grocery store clearly lied. Everyone else had clothes on.
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03-25-2020 14:53 by T
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I guarantee there's a pregnant teenager somewhere who thinks 'Covid' would be a lovely name for their child.
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03-25-2020 14:33
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Animal rights activists are currently looking for rabbits to volunteer for vaccine testing.
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03-25-2020 13:38
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Day 4 without a shower. I hope stink kills the virus!
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03-25-2020 11:12
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One of the hazards of sheep farming must be trying to stay awake while taking inventory.
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03-25-2020 10:29
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I’ve got your stimulus package right here.
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03-25-2020 10:28
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This quarantine got me thinking… What did our parents do to pass time before the Internet? I asked my 26 brothers and sisters and none of them knew either.
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03-25-2020 10:19 by Rickster
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