hovo Funny Status Messages

   It's so Hot my ice cream is melting in the freezer

   was talking with my neighbor when we saw six men kicking and punching my mother-in-law. My neighbor said "Are you going to help?" I said No, six should be enough.

   I'd mind my own business if yours was a little less interesting

   If girls think giving birth is hard try playing call of duty on a laggy server

   Copy and paste this as ur status, send it to 3 people in 10 minutes, absolutely nothing will happen! It works! Ive done it twice and both times nothing happened!

   Today, it took 473 licks to get to the center of my Tootsie Pop. You're welcome, World.

   Dang, these gas prices are higher than Charlie Sheen.

   Daylight savings is the lamest form of time travel.

   Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone.

   Thumbs up if your a Mex Thumbs down if you wanna kill all Mex

   Yo Mamas so stupid she was yelling into the mailbox. We ask her whats she doing and she said, she was sending a voice-mail.

   Sometimes I feel like only Google understands what I'm trying to say...

   if your reading this your on facebook and have no life

   Geting your wife two gifts but telling her one is for my Wife and the other is for my Lover is not a good idea. because she wont get it

   Too bad you can't photoshop your ugly personality.

   Please read! URGENT! FACEBOOK VIRUS ALERT. An email recently went out to women asking them to post the color of their bra. THIS IS A VIRUS. To fix it, you must remove your bra, then go to Settings>Enable Webcam> Record Movie> Send to me ;) lol

   I wonder if butterflies get humans in their stomach when they're anxious?

   Once you lick frosting off a cupcake it becomes a muffin

   Kinda feels weird when your computer asks if you'd like to continue unprotected....

   Don't make the same typo I did in a text to my girlfriend: "Having a great time wish you were her."