Eddy Funny Status Messages

   ‎"im thankful the idiot with the gun was too drunk to aim "---living turkey

   tonight we get to time travel & wont even need a delorean

   wonders why the trojan condom was named after something that broke through a wall & let thousands of unwanted ppl in?...terrible product naming

   i hear bieber is expecting a kid...i wonder when justin's due date is

   i could of been ur dad but ur mom didnt have change for a dollar

   i get the feeling that if Herman Cain gets elected, he's gonna call Congress "the cracker box"...a building full of white ppl or "crackers"

   if family visits tonight dressed as zombies, I just might start palying "resident evil...the wii version"

   kids have to be confused by halloween...rest of the year ur not supposed to talk to strangers or accept anything from strangers...on halloween you say "trick or treat" to a stranger & accept their candy

   you know it's holiday time when you see a charlie brown special on tv

   I guess in the shower Steven Tyler doesnt know how to "walk This Way: without falling down

   Pleas turn your mobile phone upside down now!!! Hurry 370HSSV 0773H

   when ur a kid you ask "why do I gotta pick up my toys?"...when ur an adult you get the answer

   woamn goes to clothing store. clerk asks if she nedds help. woman says "im looknig for a tie that makes my husbands blue eyes stand out" clerk says "make it tight enough & any eyes stand out"

   im ont a big fan of twilight but it does help the ego hearing the ladies say how sexy they think Edward is

   if you have ADD & OCD all you get done is getting everything organized

   if people are trying to bring you down it only means you are above them

   on the tv show "cheers" they claim its the place "where everybody knows your name"...i don't think they sold many beers at the bar if they could recall names

   theres too many car dealers around so I'm gonna go different... I'm gonna sell unicycles. i'll be the only one in the region so I'll get all the sales

   instead of watches, Timex should make hearts..."takes a cheatin & keep on beatin...takes a dumpin & keep on pumpin

   in the future i'm gonna be telling my kids "back in my day we sat the DVD player on top of the tv"