Eddy Funny Status Messages

   thought about being a gynecologist...i hear there's plenty of openings

   i have all the right answers ...you just ask the wrong questions

   why is it when you go to a restaurant their radio is never playing the song "ding, fries are done" from family guy?...seems like a catchy tune for a restaurant

   if you act like a douche i'm gonna call you "eve"

   you never see the chihuahua in the Taco Bell commercials anymore...makes me wonder what's in those 99 cent burritos

   I missed my ex today so I reloaded & shot again

   I bet there was a lot of red solo cups used last night

   when you get gifts, people say "its the thought that counts"...my cousin got me deodorant...does she think I smell bad?

   364 shopping days left

   santa has to be the greatest criminal ever...a million cases of breaking & entering...the police everywhere know where he lives but he knows how to buy everyone of them off with gifts

   Bought my son an iPad, my daughter an iPod. The wife got me an iPhone and I got her an iRon. She wasn't overjoyed even after I explained that it can be integrated with the iWash, iCook, iClean network. This activated the iNag software update

   if cannibal kids are in the yard playing with neighborhood children, is that considered "playing with their food"?

   why did it have to be Kim Jong Il...why couldn't it have been Beiber

   i feel sorry for future generation college kids.....we buy our books & can sell them back...in the future it will be a kindle download you cant sell back

   you know a friend notices & cares when their worried I wasnt on facebook much today

   an OK meal...spaghetti O's & Special K

   facebook sucks for people with attention deficit....oooh, a comment

   why do some parents send the kid to their room when their bad?..."you did something wrong so go where you keep your toys & think about it"

   now when you go to a restaurant & say "im so hungry I could eat a horse" it might actually be on the menu

   even google translate doesn't translate what women say