Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   I feel sorry for people that haven't found their true love. My ex is on her 5th.

   Now he really IS the artist formally known as Prince

   Please dont let Lifetime tell Prince's story... After what they did to Aliyah and Whitney....

   It's the end of his purple reign. R.I.P.Prince.

   Going to Hell on a full scholarship.

   One day I will solve all problems with grace & maturity. Today is not that day...

   Seeing purple rain from his Little Red Corvette

   Here's how unreal Prince was: he made Minnesota cool

   I installed some software today and decided to actually read the terms and agreement. 45 minutes later I clicked Agree but still had no idea what I was agreeing to.

   Since tomorrow is Earth Day I have decided to spend the day there and enjoy the celebrations

   RIP: The artist formerly known as Alive.

   I just heard that Prince just went to Chyna.

   Rest in Peace Prince

   The Queen has out lived the Prince

   The good news is they're putting a woman on the $20 dollar bill... The bad news is it will be worth only $14.

   The last time I had a decent sleep was for nine months when I was in my mom's womb.

   "I'm sorry" and "My bad" mean the same thing unless you're at a funeral.

   Beginning to think my dog will never accept my leg 'just wants to be friends.'

   Boss just announced he is leaving early. What a coincidence. So am I.

   if you're a tailor and your shop's name isn't "Britches get stitches" then what's the point?