Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Submit a Status Message
Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Search Messages:
«Prev
«1
1117
1118
1119
1120
1121
1122
1123
1124
6383
Next»
Page: 1121 of 6383
Hope Solo should have the "Shut the Hell Up" special for dinner tonight.
4
6
←Rate |
08-12-2016 22:12
Comments (
0
)
My debit card isn't the only thing I wanna tap tonight.
3
8
←Rate |
08-12-2016 21:52 by
@DJPhatJ
Comments (
0
)
I haven't seen one medal awarded at the Olympics for participation.
43
9
←Rate |
08-12-2016 20:32
Comments (
0
)
If you mean Elmer Fudd singing "Kill the Wabbit", then yes, I do like Opera.
13
3
←Rate |
08-12-2016 20:01
Comments (
0
)
I'm going paperless at home but it's presenting a real problem in the bathroom.
19
4
←Rate |
08-12-2016 19:38
Comments (
0
)
If I ask my mom to take a picture of me with my phone there is a 99% chance it will be a video of me yelling "It's the button on the left!"
8
2
←Rate |
08-12-2016 19:38
Comments (
0
)
.... You're offended? ...... Well .... How does it feel to be so weak that words can hurt you?
20
7
←Rate |
08-12-2016 19:34
Comments (
0
)
Han Solo is apparently quite distraught that his granddaughter Hope didn't stop that last shot.
3
1
←Rate |
08-12-2016 19:03
Comments (
0
)
I hope the guy who invented speed bumps dies waiting on an ambulance.
7
2
←Rate |
08-12-2016 17:33
Comments (
0
)
The night before the 1st day of school is just like Christmas Eve for parents
7
2
←Rate |
08-12-2016 16:39 by
Uncle Bubba
Comments (
0
)
It's so hot outside I attended a Hillary Clinton rally just to be next to something shady.
43
12
←Rate |
08-12-2016 15:47
Comments (
0
)
The Democratic and Republican parties that we once knew no longer exist. Extremists to the left of me, control freaks to the right, here I am stuck in the middle with broads.
5
9
←Rate |
08-12-2016 11:55 by
Clem Diddlyiscious
Comments (
0
)
"I was Country, when Country wasn't cool." Newsflash. It still isn't.
15
20
←Rate |
08-12-2016 11:30 by
Clem Diddlyiscious
Comments (
0
)
Pity Donald Trump never considered building a wall around his trousers.
16
19
←Rate |
08-12-2016 11:09
Comments (
0
)
Pre-marriage counseling should include putting up a tent together.
24
4
←Rate |
08-12-2016 02:08
Comments (
0
)
The only reason to have pepper spray as defense against a bear is so you can spray it on yourself so the bear enjoys its meal....
3
3
←Rate |
08-12-2016 02:07
Comments (
0
)
Heading out for a weekend camping trip. Anybody know the WiFi password for "the woods"?
9
2
←Rate |
08-12-2016 02:07
Comments (
0
)
Sorry I took 2 Benadryl and drank a wine cooler and got kicked out of Chuck E. Cheese during your kid's birthday party.
3
2
←Rate |
08-12-2016 02:03
Comments (
0
)
Sorry, but if your 8-yr-old has the audacity to tell me what color belt he has in karate, I'm obligated to fight him. This is about honor.
14
3
←Rate |
08-12-2016 02:02
Comments (
0
)
Hell hath no fury like a woman who has to pause her movie to help you find the Cheetos....
5
2
←Rate |
08-12-2016 02:00
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
1117
1118
1119
1120
1121
1122
1123
1124
6383
Next»
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com