rudeDOG Funny Status Messages

   I got in trouble at the movie theaters for putting a 'wet floor' sign infront of the door to"Magic Mike"

   am giving up a few negative people for lent. So, if you call,text,facebook or email and I don't get to back to you?? Odds are it was you

   A smart ass is someone who can sit on an ice cream cone and tell you what flavor it is.

   Judging from all the Facebooks post,I am coming out with a fragrance that smells like fresh rain!

   Im not saying your chick is ugly at all. She just reminds me of Bald Bull on Mike Tyson's punchout

   A homeless man comes up to asking for change,I say"change comes from within" he looked stunned.

   I ran out of deodorant this morning and tried my wife's Secret deodorant and I can tell you fella's it really is "strong enough for a man, but ph balanced for a woman."

   Believing Harold Camp is kinda like believing O.J. Simpson as a character witness at a murder trial

   you know you have been drinking to much when a cop get's behind your car and you ask yourself if you had been drinking today!

   Today I seen a hitchiker giving me a thumbs up.....I guess he like my Facebook status??