hovo Funny Status Messages

   I hate when cashiers ask you if that's everything. Oh no, I'd also like a hand job

   Today is Independence Day. The day when Americans show their deepest gratitude to Will Smith and thank him for saving us from the Alien Invasion!

   Just once somebody needs to roundhouse kick the person who does the 1$ bigger bid on The Price Is Right!

   Can pregnant people use the car pool lane?

   Instead of cashiers saying "here's your receipt" they should say "will you throw this away for me?"

   I can't wait till October for when Rapture the sequel comes out.

   Never thought it would happen but I actually got hungry watching 2 girls 1 cup

   It's Been A Tough Few Years For The Ocean, we've had the oil spill, the Japan radiation, and now "Hey! Mind if we put Bin Laden there too?!"

   Just told AT&T that I'd make a payment on my cell phone Sunday, so I'm really banking on this rapture sh*t..

   I've got 99 problems and I'm not dealing with any of them (Lay-Z)