Goodeolboy Funny Status Messages

   When you're working out in 108 degree heat and have to pull up your soggy underwear after going #2 FML

   My Man Crush Monday is: Obama. I hope a rock falls, and crushes his head.

   "Sharks are like dogs, they only bite when you touch their private parts"-Shark Week lesson of the day

   Remember way back when the only thing that was annoying on your feed were game requests?

   Fun prank for Californians: Adjust your wiper wash to spray the car behind you, making them believe it's raining.

   Everyone is watching the fight tonight, and I'm over here loading Rocky into the DVD player a $100 richer #winning

   This is one of those times FB needs to tag my location as "in the middle of nowhere".

   I always skip a few slices of bread as a quality control measure in a loaf. This step is to insure freshness.

   Ok gang, help me get in the loop. Is it considered taboo for Asians to drive vehicles other than a Honda or a Toyota?

   You can always tell the pessimist on a cruise ship. He's the one wearing a shark suit the whole time.