Funny Status Messages

   In an effort to repay her $20 million campaign debt, Kamala Harris has scheduled a fight with Jake Paul.

   Thanksgiving is just around the corner. Don't forget to set your scales back 10 pounds.

   When the moon hits your eye Like it’s 5:45, That’s November

   Has anyone noticed that the folks who claim,, "Eating turkey on Thanksgiving is cruel and unethical", just happen to also be the "Pro-Choice" crowd?

   Why are there no biological women trying to break into Men's bathrooms?

   This Christmas instead of gifts I'm giving everyone my opinion. Get excited!

   The 4Bs explained: Bread, Bacon, Beef, Bread. Make me a sammich.

   To all the people that couldn't stand me this year, just letting you know next year is going to be even worse.

   Someone stole my identity... And then sent it back with $100 and a note that said, "So sorry man. Hope things work out".

   Women who aren't into sports are way more feminine and don't have smelly you-know-whats.