Termite Funny Status Messages

   If you enter into a relationship and discover she has 5 kids and a Yorkshire Terrier, give it up. There's no way you'll ever win out over the Yorkie.

   Unless you’re looking for self-inflicted emotional and/or physical impairment, you should perhaps not come to me seeking relationship advice or instructions on how to do a cartwheel.

   The main difference between St. Patrick's Day and Cinco de Mayo is that no one pretends to be Mexican on Cinco de Mayo.

   It doesn't require artificial intelligence to know that artificial sweeteners taste bad.