Sierota Funny Status Messages

   The best advice I've ever seen on a sign was: "Familty Planning Use Rear Entrance"...

   That "No alcohol beyond this point" sign might as well say, "I bet you can't chug that whole beer!"...

   I'm playing hide-and-seek with my kid... He'll never find me... He's not old enough to get into the bar...

   You'd be amazed how often I'm wrong when people say, "Guess what?"

   Learn to spell... Auto Correct isn't always write...

   International Women's Day... Because it's not like you want attention on any other day...

   The Dentist is the only man certified to say to a woman, "Lay down, relax, open wide, say ahh, now spit."

   Today's Weight-Loss Tip: Use Krazy Glue instead of lipgloss...

   I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.

   There aren't any good slogans for condoms because there aren't any themes... Make some Harry Potter ones... "Protect your slytherin from hogwarts while you're in her chamber of secrets."