McFazzerino Funny Status Messages

   Dentist: "If it hurts, just imagine yourself on tropical isle lying under a palm tree." Dentist: "Does that help?" Me: "Yeah, except every 2 seconds a coconut falls and hits me in the mouth."

   Wishing all my friends a joyous, happy, and prosperous New Year. (If retail stores can jump the gun....)

   A guy gets out of the shower and and says to his wife, "So what do you think of this?" She says, "You're like a country breakfast." "Oh yeah, how so?" She says, "Fat belly 2 eggs and sausage."

   I met a nice, down to Earth woman. After a few minutes of random conversation, I casually remarked, "I'll bet anything that you're not at all materialistic." She said, "I hate sewing, so no."

   Today is Friday, December 13th. I can't tell you how relieved I am that Christmas isn't on Friday the 13th this year.

   Meanwhile, Mc Fazzerino, (the test tube baby) can spell, and signs his posts instead of hiding behind a blank name field. And is also amused by the fact that someone other than my mom knows my dad's sperm count.

   I just thought of something. The expression, "That's so 15 minutes ago" is so 15 minutes ago.

   I just realized that yet another piece of Americana is gone. The computer age has completely obliterated the following often heard phrase: "Send a self-addressed stamped envelope...."

   I wonder if anyone at the snack food companies who label their products, "Cheddar Cheese" flavored, have actually ever tasted cheddar cheese.

   I learned something from Prince. To aim as high as one possibly can when writing songs. That's why I never made it big. I never aimed high enough. I wrote a song called Little Red Chevette.