Man With Brains Funny Status Messages

   Too sick to get out of bed, the batteries in the remote control died while channel surfing, and now the TV is stuck on a SpongeBob SquarePants marathon. Oh death, where is thy sting?

   Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.

   If it smells like fish, it's a tasty dish...if it smells like cologne, leave it alone.

   Those of you in the northeast whining about the blizzard. Newsflash...you live closer to the Arctic Circle than the rest of us, it's winter, and winds are directed your way. How about this idea...move.

   Remember it's Sunday. No clever, sarcastic, or intellectual humor. The mouth breathers won't "get" them.