@sammymana Funny Status Messages

   New 1 minute porno to be made, going to be called Done in 60 seconds!

   Seeing your kid at work today really put all your other mistakes into perspective.

   I'm not entirely sure a life spent smoking e-cigarettes is worth prolonging.

   I almost sent you a real birthday card but thankfully my Internet connection came back.

   Not listening to a single word you've said makes it impossible for you to run out of things to say to me.

   "Dammit I'm Mad" is spelled the same way backwards..