StonerDudee Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon This morning I got in touch with my inner self. And that's also the last time I'll buy cheap toilet paper...
←Rate | 09-06-2012 17:10 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why are there stitch marks on zombies? Who's giving them medical attention?
←Rate | 09-11-2012 16:18 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon The girl at the Taco Bell drive thru gave me this "I know you're high" look. I snatched my 37 crunchy tacos and got out of there.
←Rate | 09-11-2012 16:28 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever you think your job sucks, remember; At least you're not the guy, at Instagram, that has to search for and delete all the d!ck pics.
←Rate | 09-11-2012 20:25 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bud light? No thanks. I'd rather light bud.
←Rate | 09-13-2012 04:18 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's longer than most relationships these days? This status.
←Rate | 09-13-2012 13:04 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey Starbucks. If you gotta name your drinks with stupid language, don't roll your eyes when I order a gitchy gitchy yaya yaya mocha choca latte ya ya
←Rate | 09-14-2012 23:53 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.
←Rate | 09-14-2012 23:57 by StonerDudee Comments (3)  


   messageicon Truth hurts...but not as much as getting fingered by Edward Scissorhands
←Rate | 10-03-2012 16:20 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey McDonalds, may I have some Coke with my ice?!
←Rate | 10-03-2012 16:25 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon My boss; Are you Tweeting? Me; No, I'm Tworking Boss; What? Me; Hello Tweeting while working Boss; That's not a real word Me; Twhatever
←Rate | 10-18-2012 20:31 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why are they called One Direction? Looks to me like they go both ways.
←Rate | 10-18-2012 20:33 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just bought a Hyundai but it's sonota big deal.
←Rate | 10-18-2012 20:40 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Febreeze should make underwear.
←Rate | 10-18-2012 20:44 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I do not have a drinking problem... people without arms have a drinking problem.
←Rate | 10-19-2012 01:37 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate it when kids think I don't care about whatever the hell they were just talking about.
←Rate | 10-19-2012 01:40 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I remember one time when I was high... I asked a cat if it could talk. It replied Me? How?
←Rate | 10-19-2012 01:41 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon When my kids ask what a word means, I tell them to bring me a dictionary. Then I smack them with it, and tell them to Google that sh!t.
←Rate | 10-19-2012 05:09 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am never more aware that I don't have boobs than when I'm paying for my own drink.
←Rate | 10-19-2012 10:09 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon That "speaking to another human being" feature on my phone has got to be my least favorite feature.
←Rate | 10-19-2012 10:11 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  




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