MigasJoe Funny Status Messages

   my ex was so fat she used to but her belt on with a boomerrang

   happy birthday to all those born today in 1928...celebrating their 21st birthday

   Watching Linda Barrett exit the pool for the 1363rd time...Doesn't anybody knock anymore!!!

   feeling a little under the weather...I wonder if there is anything on TV tomorrow if I have to miss work

   Sometimes the problem with reality is the lack of background music.

   A synonym is a word you use when you can't remember how to spell the other word.

   Bubba Watson looks like Latka from the TV show Taxi

   would like to thank all the micro-brewerys out there for making my alcoholism appear to be no more than a fun hobby

   RIP MCA...my generation will be forever in debt for the way you fought for our right to party...

   looks like God was look look lookin at his Gucci and decided it was about that time

   My wife says I look tough with my headphones on...she doesnt need to know I am listening to Annie

   It's time to go to bed when there is no more beer!!! I think Ben Franklin said this

   in just 9 months we will be witness to a population boom known as Shades of Grey Babies

   Magic Mike has the makings to be this generations Show Girls...just sayin

   The Amazing Spiderman was good but they didn't cover the part in his life where he co-founded Facebook...I assume that will be in the sequel...

   Wit is far more often a shield than a lance

   Am I the only one who thinks McDonald's should only get their beef from Macau?

   The main difference between fiction and reality, is that fiction has to make sense.

   Warning – Dates in calendars are much closer than they appear.

   Did anyone else leave the new Dark Knight movie looking forward more to the next Anne Hathaway movie than another sub par attempt at the Dark Knight