levon Funny Status Messages

   FOX News is reporting that 19 of those Arkansas birds were members of Al-Qaeda

   thinking about how to integrate the lyrics "walk like an Egyptian" into another unique status update

   NASCAR - National Association of Stupid Cars And Rednecks

   the band Nine Inch Nails should change their name to 'No Amount of Toilet Paper Helps'

   happy green vomit day!

   looks like Bin Laden's episode of Cribs didn't go that well

   Extreme Makeover is spinning off a new series starring Donald Trump... it's called Extreme Combover

   i almost rather burn than have to change my smoke detector battery

   i think i'd have to be pretty hammered to see Thor

   shouldn't the DMV have a drive thru?

   just downloaded this new app called iColi... it's sick!

   CANADA - Crying About Never Actually Defeating Americans 

   Facebook Friends = 427 Friends When I have To Move = 0

   facebook should have a 'I AM ON THE RAG' notification for women

   if Casey Anthony didn't pay her taxes, she'd be in prison right now

   i like to fast forward through menopause commercials

   they need full length mirrors at the self-checkout line in the grocery store

   our economy has Dow Syndrome

   they should cast Demi as Ashton's girlfriend and rename the show - 'Two and a half decades older'

   maybe they should make a game for your phone where you can shoot women into the air with a slingshot and try to destroy everything men say and call it ANGRY B*TCHES