migasjoe Funny Status Messages

   (last one I promise) - LaBron James will publish his autobiography as soon as he can come up with a TITLE

   If ladies could read my thoughts I would get slapped in the face A LOT!!!

   BREAKING NEWS: NFL owners and players are meeting today to determine whether I'll have to spend Sundays with my family this fall...

   was thinking about going into politics but I don't think I could ever cheat on my wife

   worried about his financial future...even Daylight Savings Time has a better plan than me...

   if you don't stand for something you will fall for anything

   your greatest "Hello" and your hardest "Goodbye"

   taking applications and will soon be conducting interviews for anyone that is interested on giving my euology

   vacation plans this year include a state wide convienence store hot dog tasting tour this summer

   some days 25 to life just seems like it would be worth it!!!!!

   how come when we talk to God we are praying...when God talks to us we are schizophrenic

   eventually we all stop lying about our age and start bragging about it!!!

   I have a buddy that is a vegetarian not because he loves animals but because he hates plants!!!

   writing about music is like dancing about architecture

   just told my kids about the Casey Anthiny verdict and that if they didn't shape up I was moving the family to Florida

   the art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook!!!

   Money can't buy you happiness but I'd rather be unhappy and in a Bentley

   if you put pictures of lost kids on Beer Cans instead of Milk Cartons we'd find them in about 15 minutes

   Really!!! Kim Kardashian is upset with the Casey Anthony verdict!!! Your father defended OJ Simpson, Thus starting the Kardashian tradition of getting black men off!!!

   OK-all those that believe in psyco kinesis raise my hand