greg2missy Funny Status Messages

   I'm always hearing stories of people posting "Inappropriate" pics on Facebook....Why are none of YOU showing me nude pics my friends????

   From now on I'm boycotting Shampoo....I demand REALPoo!!!!

   I need someone really bad. Are you really bad?

   Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

   The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

   Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.

   Apparently there's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

   I was suppose to let you all know the Procrastinators Club will meet last Thursday......

   Today I told my car it's okay for it to tell me if it's a transformer. It didn't answer. I figure it's just waiting for the right moment.

   Am I the only one that flips back and forth like a little kid when I discover 2 radio stations playing the same song?

   Black History Month reminded me that Peanut Butter was invented by a black guy...I Assume "Chunky" was in reference to his White Girlfriend...

   I always thought visiting Egypt would be fun. Now I hear it's a RIOT!!

   With the fuel prices as high as they are, I'm going to be BAD this year and hope Santa brings me COAL!!!

   Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.....With a Hot Blonde and Winning Lottery Ticket!!.....DAMN!!! Didn't work again.....

   To the person that first took a Peanut, covered it with Chocolate and a Candy Coat and Stamped a "M" on it....THANK YOU!!!

   If the NBA wants to increase viewers, they should start playing FOOTBALL!!!

   I bought the new Kurt Cobain Bobble Head doll....but now the d@mn head keeps popping off it.....

   You know the person on the other end of the phone is comfortable with you when you can hear the toilet flushing.....

   Today I told my car it's okay for it to tell me if it's a transformer. It didn't answer. I assume it's just waiting for the right moment.

   Wish Adam would have spent more than just a rib.....